You can't concentrate. You read the same email three times and still don't know what it says. You walk into a room and forget why. You lose your train of thought mid-sentence. You can't remember your own phone number.
This isn't weakness. This isn't ageing. This is grief.
Grief affects your ability to concentrate, make decisions, and hold multiple things in your mind at once. This isn't a metaphor — it's measurable. Your brain is using most of its power on the loss, and there's simply less left over for everything else.
After a traumatic loss like suicide, the mental load is even higher. Your mind is simultaneously trying to process the death, manage intrusive thoughts, keep up appearances, and function at work. That's four jobs at once. Of course you can't remember your password.
Some things that help. Write everything down — not as a self-improvement habit, but as a survival tool. Keep a running list of tasks. Set reminders for things you'd normally remember. If you have deadlines, ask for extensions early rather than missing them and feeling worse.
Batch the simple tasks. Reply to all the easy emails in one go. Do the routine work first. Save anything that requires real thinking for the window when your brain is clearest — you'll learn when that is.
Accept that you're operating at reduced capacity. It's temporary. The fog lifts — not all at once, but gradually. In the meantime, you're not failing. You're functioning under conditions that would affect anyone.